Would You Like Cream With Your Bat?

Woman wakes up, should have smelled the coffee

2 days ago

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa (AP) — It wasn't just the caffeine that gave an Iowa woman an extra jolt after she had her morning coffee. It was also the bat she found in the filter.

The Iowa Department of Public Health says the woman reported a bat in her house but wasn't too worried about it. She turned on her automatic coffee maker before bedtime and drank her coffee the next morning.

She discovered the bat in the filter when she went to clean it that night. The woman has undergone treatment for possible rabies.

Health officials say that the bat was sent to a lab but that its brain was too cooked by the hot water to determine whether it had rabies.

Try Explaining This To Your Wife!

Hospital tells grandfather, 71, that he's pregnant

3 days ago

PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — A patient treated for agonizing abdominal pain received this surprising news in the hospital's paperwork: "Based on your visit today, we know you are pregnant." Surprising indeed for 71-year-old John Grady Pippen.

The staff at Curry General Hospital in Gold Beach gave the retired mechanic and logger the ridiculously happy news this month, along with some pain pills.

Hospital administrator William McMillan says an errant keystroke caused the hospital's computer to spit out the wrong discharge instructions for the grandfather.

Tippi Hedren Where Are You?????

Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds" BarbieDoll

In 1963, Alfred Hitchcock, the Master of Suspense, gave us a tale of terror not soon forgotten in his film “The Birds.” Dressed in a re-creation of the stylish green skirt suit worn by the film’s ill-fated heroine in an iconic scene, Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds” Barbie® Doll celebrates the 45th anniversary of the acclaimed film. From the doll’s classic ensemble to the perfectly painted expression to the accompanying black birds, every aspect captures the film’s infamous appeal.

You Just Can't Make This $hit Up!!!

Orphaned hare raised in woman's bra
When Cherida Cannon's labrador Teal chased and killed a hare, she set about preparing it for the pot.

But there was a surprise in store. The hare turned out to be pregnant, and its unborn baby's heart was still beating.

A frantic rescue mission was launched -- and today the tiny, helpless creature has grown into a bounding tame hare called Miracle.

Describing the moment when Teal brought her his prey, Mrs Cannon, of Alton, Hampshire said: "The hare was so beautiful, I just couldn't bare to throw her away. I thought she'd make a nice meal so started gutting her."

It was her cleaner, Tina Rhodes, who noticed the unborn baby. Mrs Rhodes said: "I rubbed its chest and blew on it and dried it with a towel, then suddenly it opened its eyes and begun cleaning itself."

The women mixed up baby formula belonging to Mrs Cannon's granddaughter and fed it to the baby hare, known as a leveret, with a syringe every hour.

Mrs Rhodes's sister, Margi Heath, was put in charge of caring for the orphaned creature. Mrs Heath, 57, said: "She stayed indoors with me. I put her in my bra to keep her warm, else she would have died. I slept with her and every time she was hungry she popped her head up."

Here's the full story.

At least it's not in the elevator!

Tackle Tailgate Flatulence Before the Next Game with CharcoCaps

No pass is a good pass, when it comes to 'passing intestinal gas'

East Longmeadow, MA (PRWEB) September 10, 2008 -- It's time to rethink what's cooking at the tailgate party when the "exhaust fumes" are coming from you, not the parked car. Intestinal gas is one of the body's most embarrassing functions, especially when the sound isn't muffled by cheering fans and the odor is pungent. In fact, according to a recent survey for CharcoCaps Homeopathic AntiGas Formula, 72 percent of adults nationwide admit to passing gas in public or in front of someone else.

Most pre-game celebration fare -- hamburgers, baked beans and alcohol -- have a tendency to trigger intestinal gas. Dr. Patricia Raymond, M.D., gastroenterologist and assistant professor at Eastern Virginia Medical School, says "we all experience flatulence. Yet, we can get it under control if we slightly change our diets -- even at a tailgate party."

HADRON COLLIDER UPDATE

If you're wondering where you can go for up-to-the-minute information on whether the Hadron Collider has destroyed the world yet, the answer is: here.

Who Ever Said That The Russian's Don't Have A Sense Of Humor

Spa town erects enema statue

A Town in southern Russia has erected a monument in the shape of an enema to celebrate the famous medical procedure.

The bronze syringe bulb statue held by three angels was unveiled in the city of Zheleznovodsk, a region known for dozens of spas where enemas with water from mineral springs are routinely administered to treat digestive and other complaints.

Standing at one and a half metres and weighing 400kg, the $44,000 sculpture was installed in a square in front of the Mashuk-Akva Term spa, with a banner declaring: "Let's beat constipation and sloppiness with enemas".

"There is no kitsch or obscenity, it is a successful work of art," said spa director Alexander Kharchenko.

"An enema is almost a symbol of our region."

The monument was designed with "irony and humour", said sculptor Svetlana Avakina, who modelled the angels on the works of Italian Renaissance painter Alessandro Botticelli.

Ms Avakina hopes to promote the sculpture as a brand and turn it into a franchise with souvenirs and awards for medical doctors.

"This device is eternal, it will never change," she said.